Sunday, October 21, 2012

It's no chick flick, it's real life. And I dig real life.

Over the last two months, I've had the opportunity to attend some wedding festivities of close friends. Being a 29 year old female here in Utah, you'd imagine I would've attended a lot of wedding festivities in my lifetime, but this actually isn't the case. Other than a handful of receptions here or there, I don't generally find myself participating in wedding things. There's no real rhyme or reason why I haven't been a major "participant" - it's just how it's worked out.

In September, my long time friend and roomie for 8 years-ish got married in to an amazing guy. I had the blessed privilege to see them sealed together in the Salt Lake City, LDS temple and then join them for a ring ceremony and reception later that day. The entire experience was perfect.

This weekend, I attended the reception of my roommate marrying her boyfriend of two years. It was a simple yet elegant reception with creative treats, a dance floor, and video display of the couple depicting pictures from infancy, through childhood, and finally their journey together. This isn't anything I  haven't seen before, but I still found it touching and may have even shed a tear. I'm such a girl... sometimes.

I bring up these two instances because both taught me an incredible yet obvious lesson. Something that probably a lot of you happily married people understand and that all of us single people hope for.  But until these last two months, I never really "got it" like I get it now. The lesson is that each of these friends married their best friend. How truly important that actually is! This truly means something to me now. Not only do they love each other - but the like each other too! What a novel idea!.

If any of you know me, and I expect some of you do, you know I'm not much of a "romantic." Okay, I'm not much of a gooey, cheesey, chick flicky, Austonian type who gushes or flaps at her face when boy meets girl. It takes a lot for me to get the twitter-pates and I generally roll my eyes at most expressions of lovey dovey declarations. For me, most of those cinematic depictions of "love" seem so, hollow, contrived, and... well... just plain silliness. I've tried to self-diagnose this very un-girly ailment of mine, and the closest I've come is comparing my twitter-pation of the X-Files and the respective Mulder and Scully relationship and why that gets me going more than most any chick flick you could possibly name. Mulder and Scully have a relationship built on respect, trust, and deep-seeded friendship. Something I truly admire about any relationship. While most chick flicks, well, it's some sort of immediate twitterpation i.e. lust generally based on a false pretense because someone's best friend bet them they couldn't go out with that hot waitress and subsequently turn the ugly duckling into the Prom Queen while accidentally falling in love with the mother. Or perhaps it's the attempt to convey some blinding irrational passion that takes a person's utter most self control to contain the burning desires within that makes me risk rolling my eyes so fair back into my head they'll pop out my butt. "It's like I've taken love heroine?" Oh shut up, Edward. You're such a wuss! Pull it together!

It. Just. Doesn't. Seem. Real.

So the point... I have one...

Marrying your best friend. The two weddings I mentioned above is what it looks like when people have not only a deep love for each other, but a binding friendship and happiness that allows them to be who they are with someone who wants them for who they are. Two complete people melding their lives together, intertwining their individualness into a greater whole. I heard it said once that love isn't taking two of the same and making them fit - it's like taking two different puzzle pieces and fitting them together as part of a greater picture. It's complementing rather than imitating. I could see this "fitting together" in these couple's faces, their photos, their smiles, their jokes. There was nothing contrived or pretended or kitchy... there was nothing of worry or stress about the days activities... it was all grounded in something that will go beyond that one day and stretch into the eternities. It was not a moment floating on a cloud, but a beautiful solid and progressing reality they can grip tightly. To spend your entire life with your best friend, that someone who laughs at your jokes, makes you feel confident at your worst times, isn't afraid to show you they love you, supports your dreams, and gives you wings to fly, is probably one of the greatest blessings we can ever receive on this earth. I feel in this complicated and sometimes oppressing world, with it's 50% divorce rates, abuse, betrayal, and sorrow, starting something off the right way is key to cultivating something that will beat the statistics and add joy to your life more than it adds any sort of sadness. Starting that off the right way, in seeking a best friend first, is an excellent way to go about it. For the first time in my life, I actually finally get what it means to marry your best friend - someone who is true to themselves, true to you, and allows you to be true to yourself. I'd say if there's a recipe for forever, that's a good one.

Congratulations and best of happiness to my friends who married their best friends! And thanks for helping me understand that I'm not a cold-hearted bag, I just find more love in sharing jokes than sharing spit.

To end with a quote (thanks, E for sharing!):

 "What really matters is that he will love you, that he will respect you, that he will honor you, that he will be absolutely true to you, that he will give you the freedom of expression and let you fly in the development of your own talents. He is not going to be perfect, but if he is kind and thoughtful, if he knows how to work and earn a living, if he is honest and full of faith, the chances are you will not go wrong, that you will be immensely happy.”
 - President Gordon B Hinckley

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Something about a Birthday or the Radio Silence is Broken or Dead things, Mikey, Dead things!

A hoy! It is I! You thought I’d given up on us, didn't you? Well, I haven’t… just on blogging for awhile. I elected to take a bloggery vacation and didn't tell anyone... not even me. Sometimes, the tank is just empty, ya know? That generally happens when this thing we call "real world" consumes my thoughts and that other thing we call "creativity" is moved to the back burner for awhile. It's tragic, really. Unfortunate that life becomes so practical we forget to be a little fantastical once in awhile - attempting to keep the magic of life alive between grocery lists and bridal showers and nights at the gym because if you stop working out and fatten up you'll never get marrieds.  These things take time! They take effort! They are a creativity suck.

Moving right along…

This post is actually NOT about dating if you can believe it… not all of it anyway. Nor do i care to hear your thoughts or advice. It was just a nice opener for a much more interesting bit of bloggery.

 BIRTHDAYS!!!! Or more to the point, MY Birthday! And there was much rejoicing throughout the land... a gitless land.

I like my Birthday and I LOVE that it is housed in the greatest month of the year, October! And no amount of poor dating luck could EVER take that joy away from me EVER. Particularly when there is a…

One-Foot-In-The-Grave Party to be had!

That’s right! And YOU’RE invited! Yes you! Mom, no really, you can come.

The idea is that everyone has to show up as something dead or dying. Morbid? You bet! But it combines my top October loves: my Birthday and Halloween. It also honors the return of The Walking Dead on AMC on October 14th, AND allows people to get a little creative early in the month! My b-day being on October 12th. The pictures will be EPIC. 

Also on the Birthday note, I was inspired by my pal Jaime to create a “Birthday List.” This may seem a bit “wow… she’s telling people what to buy her for her Birthday? Psh, presumptuous bag.,” but that’s ONLY because I’m telling people what to buy me for my Birthday. And I actually really like giving presents as much as I like getting them so for those of you out there like me, who LOVE getting presents for people and LOVE me and LOVE getting people what they WANT and LOVE that I’m throwing a One-Foot-In-The-Grave party so you can finally be that dead historical figure you adore without appearing to be a HUGE super geek (pst, I dig super geeks... Call me), then my friends, you have come to the right place!


Andrea’s Birthday (could also be used for Christmas) LIST!
(i.e. Don’t care how, I want it now!)

Cozy things: lounge pants, soft hoodies, blankys, full pajama set with frolicking kittens, slouchy sweaters, and thick socks. I don't have enough of them, I never buy them, but I REALLY want them. I want them ALL! I also like sweaters with cats... but not ugly ones... hip ones. Hip cats.




Expensive but an example of slouchy hip sweater

UofU bookstore or like, Sports stores?

Gift cards from the below will be VERY happily and even tearfully accepted. I love shopping. That's why I always look so good ;) So help me help you be able to look at me looking good. 

Urban Outfitters
Barnes and Noble
(I got sick of finding all the links... you're smart people. You can find them)

Soap and Glory's Righteous Body Butter. OR, vats of body butter from The Body Shop. I don't care for foody smells.. more like the musky, floral, fresh smells. Nom, yes. 

Movie tickets. I love going to the movies and there are some EXCELLENT films coming out soon (Skyfall, The Hobbit, Les Miserables... The Hobbit) 

Scarves. Or this scarf

And finally, if you really feel like you need to make a good impression and in fact, have hopes of me falling in love with you.. or at the VERY least... would like me to exclaim in front of everyone "You are the best present-giver EVER!" I present to you the below:

Les Belles De Ricci Perfume

I got this perfume when I was in Paris circa 2005. We were only there for 3 days, but during those 3 days I bought the following 3 things: street bookcart French version of Cyrano de Bergerac, a green floral "echarpe" (scarf) I still wear, and Les Belles Des Ricci Perfume. I ran out ages ago... and I want it back so much.

I'll also take this ;) Oh yes I did. 
Like... $90 

And really, just your friendship is awesome. But if you threw in a nicely wrapped pair of socks, I wouldn't say no ;)