Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Fine. I will BUY ANOTHER Ipod! Grrrrraw!

About 3 weeks ago... I couldn't find my new crimson Ipod Nano I purchased in September. The feeling of losing your new Nano is akin to locking your keys in your car while it's running or not being able to immediately locate your debit card. After two days of not seeing it - I started to really freak out.

Of course I retraced my steps in detail; trying to mentally make it appear where I envisioned it could possibly be. I recalled on Saturday, using my Ipod to mull around Smiths while grocering. I had it with me in the car, and very clearly recall seeing it resting happily at the bottom of my yellow purse after that. Since then, I have no idea what happened to it. I looked for it seriously the following Monday when I wanted it for my work out. I couldn't find it anywhere. I didn't want to accept it was gone - and hoped it would turn up sooner or later.

Well, after dumping out every purse, back-pack, and bag I own, cleaning out my clothes drawers, scouring my car with a flashlight, checking all places a rather facetious cat might've drug some tempting dangling headphones, in kitchen drawers, and the refrigerator, every nook in my office and every corner of my little apt, and... nothing. Nowhere. I can't find it. All that's left is a gloomey armband and computer chip for my Nike shoes to record my workings out. Sigh. Oh, and the hole in my heart where my beautiful crimson Ipod used to be. A moment of silence please...

Yes I prayed to find it. Buuuuuut, I felt like ya know, disease, hunger, and war were probably a higher priority than an Ipod and really, losing it was probably my fault. I considered perhaps that I had left it in my car on the seat and somehow someone got in there without damaging anything else and snagged it. Possible, yes. Probable? Meh. But the crimson Ipod as I knew it is now given up for lost and dead - and it's time to replace it before I got NUTS! was my seller of choice as I could get a used one and not pay as much for it as I did for my bran spanking new Crimson one. And honestly, if I'm going to make a habit of losing my electronic gems I don't care to pay a lot for them. It's like sunglasses. I don't pay more than $15 for sunglasses because I ultimately lose or break them. Sunglasses I can handle - but Ipods? You better believe I'm chaining this one to my FACE! Or gluing it to my hip!

I got a green one this time. It just didn't seem right to get another Crimson one. It's like your old beagle dieing and trying to get another beagle - can't do it - you have to get a Westie instead because you've already "done the beagle" thing and honestly, show some respect! Siiiiiigh. And hopefully I will be a little more responsible with this one... or maybe save on shipping and just flush $130 down the toilet. Same same.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Follow up to Favorite Thing #6

A's in BOTH my first semester Graduate Courses! Ahahahahahahahha HA HAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! gaaaaaasp AHAHAHAHHA!!!!!
(that's maniacal laughter by the way)
Hardest A's I've ever earned in my life! EVER!


These are a few of my favorite things...

Ah Christmas. I must admit this year I was much more into the Christmas Spirit than I have been in years past. I think it had something to do with my reoccurring winters of DOOM I've experienced the last handful of years... it sorta takes the magic out of Christmas when your life constantly fails at this time every year. Yes, that could be much of why I was 'feeling' Christmas more this year... no pending DOOM.

Here were a few of my favorite things this Christmas season... in no particular order... (and apologies... I never take pictures of these things and I really need to. I mean how often does your rather serious Aunt put on a Hillary Clinton mask and do a right jolly jig? Not often! These things need to be visually documented! I feel a New Years resolution coming on... oh yes I do).

I attended many a Holiday festivity during the month of December than I have in the past. This includes Ballet West's the Nutcracker (classic), the MoTab (Mormon Tabernacle Choir) Christmas Concert (brilliant as always.. featuring Ms. Natalie Cole), and a Jon Schmidt Christmas concert. Now, all 3 of these carry their own special little holiday spirit, but I must say that Jon Schmidt may have been my favorite this time around. He puts on a fantastic show! It helped that my friend Camille has a certain brother (cough, Steven Sharp Nelson) who plays the cello alongside Jon Schmidt and was able to give us some fantastic tickets, but honestly, I was thoroughly entertained the entire time. My what that did for my Christmas Spirit!

1. Favorite thing: Jon Schmidt Christmas Concert

I also have a stable(ish) job this year and wasn't constantly flirting with the poverty line every time I attempted to by something more than peanut butter and jelly to fill my rumbley tummy (now that's just sad). I actually bought my family and a few friends some decent Christmas gifts this year! This may blow your mind but I really enjoy Christmas shopping for other people! I start making mental notes MONTHS in advance of what I can get this person or that family member for Christmas that will really knock their socks off (and I love Christmas socks!)! I believe my BEST gifting this year goes to my little brother Taylor who received the animated Hobbit movie and a sweet necklace from Urban Outfitters. Happy Christmas boy! He enjoyed them... or faked it really well.

2. Favorite thing: non-poverty so I can buy good Christmas presents like the Hobbit for Taylor.
I also had many a happy opportunity to donate and serve in various capacities as per the PURPOSE of this Yuletide (one word come to find) season this year. One such opportunity entailed myself and a partner in crime wrapping presents dressed as elves for one of the counselor's in my Bishoprics wives. It was actually pretty fun! We had a service auction for a Family Home Evening (FHE) the first of December and the idea is to auction off 'services' and 'goods' in exchange for cans that subsequently end up at the food bank. As my service, I offered to wrap all of 'someones' Christmas presents that year dressed as a happy little elf. WELL! Here I am expecting some dude to buy my service to wrap his 3 boxes... it didn't even occur to me that there would be 3 Bishopric's wives attending said auction and would likely pay good cans to have someone wrap all their kids, grandkids, long time neighbors, in-laws, co-workers, and spouses Christmas presents. Serves me right for not thinking through these things! THUS - my service went to Sis C and 4 hours later on a snowy December Tuesday - my elf companion and I finished up some massive Christmas wrapping of some of the coolest toys I've ever seen! The grandkids ended up coming over to Sis C's house our last hour tickled red and green that there were actual Elves wrapping their presents; "Where are the elves!?!?!" they exclaimed bursting in the door, "I want to see the ELVES!" It. Was. Awesome.
3. Favorite thing: getting to dress up as an elf while performing service for someone.

Next, as 26 years of tradition dictates, I went over the river and through the woods (literally... I'm from 'Sticks', Utah... aka... Emery County) to Grandma's house. Grandma's house is the best place in the world as far as I'm concerned, and I always love going to her house. It's full of fun and food and food and also some fantastic Grandparents - likely the best on the planet. I know have some pics of Grandma's house around here somewhere (sifting through computer docs) but in the meantime you will just have to take my word for it.

4. Favorite thing: Grandma's house.

Lastly, I got many an enjoyable Christmas present that included a Pampered Chef stoneware baking slab, the new Star Trek movie (Spock is hot... Spock is hot... Spock is hot), a variety of lotions (honestly, Twilight Woods from Bath and Body is pretty awesome... don't let the the collective girly sigh you just heard at the mention of the word 'Twilight' deter you...), and so forth. However, I feel one of the best Christmas presents out there is a gift card. And not just any gift card mind you, but an ITunes gift card. Receiving such an item makes on reflect on how much gifting has changed since the days of tapes and walkmans. Come... walk with me to 1995. I remember very vividly through the years getting a tape walkeman, then a CD walkman (hello 1998!), then a variety of CD's over the years (up until 2004-ish), then an IPod (2005), and now, Itunes gift cards have replaced the classic CD-in-case gift. And really, I love having $50 to use on Itunes however I want (which subsequently, is really easy to use really quickly). I guess that's what getting old and boring means - no one wants to pick something for you so they just have you pick it yourself via rectangular plastic loaded with money. I really don't see how you can go wrong with that...

5. Favorite thing: Gift Cards... Itunes Gift Cards.
And that sums up some of my favorite happenings of the Christmas season this year. It really was an excellent Christmas - and I hope you had an excellent Christmas (or Hanukkah or Holiday or Boxing Day or... break from school and work so those other people can celebrate in their cultural and/or religious ways) too. And perhaps, if your Christmas seemed a little 'hum-buggy' this year - never fear! For as one who has gone through several winters of DOOM that encompassed the cheery Holiday season, it will make each subsequent Christmas MUCH better than it otherwise would've been. Simple pleasures.
Favorite Thing Number 6!!! Got an A in one of my classes!!!! Still waiting for the other classes grade to appear... but hey! An A so far! Holla!

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Online Profile Comment(s) of the Day

If anything this is giving me some good blog-fodder, right? 2 posts in 2 days! A record!

From another self-described, "Very Good Looking"

Ahem hem...

Under the profile heading, What I do for Fun:

"I prefer but am not limited to classy woman."

Good to know he doesn't limit himself. Good for you man! Good for you! What does that even mean... exactly? (You better believe I sent him a message asking what that meant. Now taking bets as to IF he answers and WHAT he'll say. Best hypothetical scenario receives a e-high five from me!)

Runner up comment (same monkey) under the profile heading, How I Feel About the Church:

"I am not a cruise ship director. So many girls just sit back on a date and expect to be entertained. while most say I am quite funny, I am not here to entertain you."

So, reasonably, could a girl counter this with: "I am not a beauty queen. Some guys expect me to shower and do my hair for a date. While I am very attractive, I am not here to look nice for YOU!"

Eh? Maybe! I for one think 'trying' helps... especially when you are asking a girl out. Now, I'm sure no one expects a song and dance number, but when I guy picks me up and says "So... like what do you want to do?" I want to say... "uh... honestly go read my novel by the fireplace, but instead I have to plan a date that you invited me on." Ladies get dolled up for them, they can plan the evening. I feel it's a give and take. Right? How hard is to plan hot chocolate and a walk around the lights at Temple Square... probably not hard as I did it in about 2 seconds just this moment. Keep it simple, but please put some effort into it. If you asked her out - clearly she's worth some effort right?

As to the clear heading displacement issues of Monkey-man, you should know he filled up both of those above questions in addition to using up his 1000 character limit for the "A little about me..." section with more about him, him, and a bit about him, and his preferences (but not limits on) the womens he's a-lookin for... and his sweet boat of coolness. Yeeeeep.

And the search goes on...

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Because I just can't have a real break can I? CAN I?!??!

This morning I received an email from my professor of a class I'm taking next semester, starting the 2nd week of January, near 3 weeks away (I want to make sure you are fully aware of the scandalous nature of the following), entitled "Holiday Reading."

What the!?!??!

Yes... he "suggested" that we get started on (and finish) not one, but TWO of our required texts over the holiday break (ya know, because we clearly will have time as we are on break... BREAK!!! You're missing the POINT!)... oh "and one is a little meaty so I suggest reading with a pencil and making notes in the margins."

... ... ...

There are not words strong enough...

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Top 5 Things I've Learned/Noticed About Online Dating in 1 Week


It's been a week since I signed on to the online dating scene with LDSPlanet. I can actually say I can see how this is a somewhat useful dating tool. Why do I say this? Well I actually went out on a date with a very nice guy I met "online." Eh? 8 years in singles wards = 3 dates... 4 days on LDSPlanet = 1 date. Not. Bad. At. All. What's more is the guy was actually, well, normal. Now none of you get too excited... it can't be THAT easy because in the end, I wasn't really interested enough for a second date - BUT - if anything it was encouraging.

Of course, there are also the really weird things I've already noticed about online dating. I'd like to tell you of my top 5. These include anything from comments on "profiles" to "chat rooms" to "flirts." If you've ever done the online dating thing - you will know exactly what I mean.

My top 5 Lessons/Observations of Online Dating After 1 Week

5. On a scale of Average, Good Looking, and Very Good Looking - some dudes actually have the audacity... or presumption... ("confidence?" snort) to rate themselves as Very Good Looking. What's more, is each of us has our own little profile picture next to our self-descriptions. So, I'd say it's a pretty big risk to rate yourself as Very Good Looking and post your picture for others to see just how Very Good Looking you are, withouth considering that they've not set our expectations unreasonabley high. Or, perhaps it's more of a reassurence to all those ladies out there that "Hey, don't let the picture fool you! I am, in fact,Very Good Looking! You see? I've listed it as so right there. Therefore, it is true." I'll be honest - there have been a few that are indeed "Very Good Looking" who have described themselves as such, but the fact that THEY posted it - well - I don't think there's room for both me AND their egos at a table for two (three maybe).

4. Everyone... EVERYONE... is "laid back and fun loving... but can be serious when I need to be too"

3. Everyone... EVERYONE.. is "up for anything... I like everything!"

2. Dudes my father's age find nothing weird, pervy, or creepy about sending a 26 year old girl a flirty yellow face with heart eyes exclaiming "I'm interested in you!" Groooooss. Blocked!

1. Dudes can still come across as tools online as well as in person so really - you can eliminate THAT risk of hoping he's not a tool in 'real life' because yes, you can tell quiet easily online just as you could in person. See experience below:

Tool describing himself as Very Good Looking (which... uh... I can see your pic yo) IM's me:
"Hey... wat r u up 2?" (strike 1! He no likey the spelling out of big boy words)
Me: "Nothing... how are you?"
10 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... good. So when we going out?"
Me: "Well you let me know and I'll see what I can pencil in."
10 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... ur busy?" (does lol mean something else than laugh out loud? Have I been utilizing it under that context this whole time and it truly meant something like... er... I can't even think of anything that would make his "lol's" plausible)
Me: "Oh well ya know, just school, and holidays, and work, and living... that kind of stuff"
5 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... cool. I hate dates."
Me:"Oh? So, you don't have a typical first date you take a gal out on or anything?"
Tool: "lol... going out with me would be anything bt typical."
Me: "Oh, so atypical?"
10 minutes of silence
Tool: "lol... yeah... I just like to get to know someone."
Me: "Wow. I bet that's really hard since you hate dates, particularly typical ones. I don't even know how you'd work around that scenario."
Tool: "lol... dunno. Guess we'd go to dinner."
Me (clearly enjoying that he does not know I am mocking him): "That's funny. Cause that sounds both like a date and typical."
Tool: "lol..."
10 minutes of non-response
Me: "WELL! Guess I better get to bed (at 9:00)"
Tool: "So should I get ur number?"
Me: (thought: HELL NO!)"Probably not tonight. I don't give out my number... typically"
Tool: (can you guess?) "lol... lata."

You see? Not even a question this guy is a complete idiot. And what's more fun - he didn't even remotely recognize my patronizing his idiocy. Is that wrong for me to take joy in that? Naaaaw!!! I'm allowed some entertainment from it - or I may very well lose hope there's any normal, adjusted, non man-child, out there who knows how to function in society. I'm clinging to that hope with all the gusto I gots in me baby!

So there you have it - exactly what you thought online dating might be, but maybe a little of what you didn't. Sure there are the weirdys and "Very Good Looking's" living on their own delusional 'me-planet' - but there are also some dudes utilizing this little device as yet one more way to open themselves up to meeting new folks (which by the way, Everyone on here LOVES to do!). And honestly - meeting Tool online and meeting him in the Singles Ward would've been the same experience... just a different mode of communication.

lol... lol... lol

Stay tuned...

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

It has come to this... online dating

Well! I've made the big move. Yes, it's true... I have signed up on a (deep breath) LDS Singles dating site. It has finally come to this...

LDSPlanet. That's where I am... and I guess that makes me an "online dater?" Oh man. I can't even tell you how hesitant I was to do this; but let me tell you why I did it (not that I need to explain anything to the likes of YOU!... but maybe a little to myself). I have several friends who are acquainted with and have joined many sites like this... LDS Singles sites particularly. And they all say, "I was skeptical at first..." and though this hasn't yet been followed by a "now I'm engaged!" ;) it HAS been followed by "and really, it's just another place to meet new people and that's nice." Which kinda sold me on it. Singles Wards, School, and Work. Nada. So, what other options are there?

I have one particular friend who, after moving to SLC and attending her singles ward, was frustrated (we're all riding that train sista!) about not having any opportunities to meet anyone new. And really ya'll, can I tell you I've gone on a grand total of 3 dates with dudes from my Singles Ward in my ENTIRE 8 years, 8 YEARS, attending Singles Wards... and 2 of those dates were with the same guy. Yes. 3 dates. 8 years. Those odds aren't particularly encouraging. Not encouraging at all. Pointless Singles Wards! (I will save my "Singles Wards are pointless for what they're meant to do" rant for a later time).

Anyway, so my friend signed up on LDSPlanet and LDSSingles and has been a dating machine for the last handful of months. Now, again, most of the dates have just been first dates and some have been with those type of creepers you expect to find living (no really... I don't think they have day jobs) on these sites - but there have been those token few outings that have encouraged my friend to keep at it. Keep on trucking. She also mentioned it's made her a better dater and shown her what she really likes in a person and what she just can't handle. So, I find those things very useful as a 26 year old, also not knowing where to meet anyone new, single gal. Plus, what do I have to lose?

So... here's my little experiment with online dating. I signed up. I'm going to give it a concerted effort and see how it goes. 6 month membership baby! I'm PAYING for this shiz! But in the end, I think it will be beneficial in some respects. I mean, it's been 3 days and already I've had conversations with some dudes that I actually would consider going out with. 3 days! Compare that with 8 years... and suddenly this has been the answer all along. Wish me luck!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Sexy takes on new meaning with Jumpin Jammerz

I had myself a right good laugh about this. I mean, I'm right to laugh at this, aren't I? Come on! I mean they look oh so cozy and nice, but honestly, I don't think their entirely marketing them the right way. Sexy and Jumpin Jammerz aren't necessarily appropriate bed-fellows in my mind (if you'll excuse the pun). These are just a flash back to old school pj's you ran around in when you were between the ages of 0-9. Somehow I find this whole thing a little kinky... so maybe their marketing is spot on after all! What do ya think? Check it out:

This to me says "Hey baby... I gots to pee..."

"... ... ... there are no words..."
Shhh princess. Don't tell, but I'm wearing ducky footies to seduce my man. He'll never see THIS sexy mamma coming.

"Look! I'm a monkey! A spotted monkey in the jungle! Call me Tarzan!"

My personal favorite. Dude, no one is calling you when you're wrapped in red pj's with footies. Wow. It just doesn't scream "man" to me.

Can't get enough of these Jumpin Jammerz? Well never fear! BAM And just so you know... they make "sheer" ones too. Now that's sexy! Sheer footies!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

I lost a bet... big time

WELL! Can't say I don't pay up right? My co-worker Marisa and myself had a friendly little bet on ye olde Holy War outcome. And, all Max Hall remarks aside, in the end BYU was the victor this year (THIS YEAR!) I was the big ol' loser of our friendly wager. What was the wager you ask? Well... I think you can figure it out for yourself. Oh the shame! The horror!
The Walk of Shame

My Best Zoobie Impression. Eh? Please tell me I DON'T pull it off

A tribute to Max Hall (this will never get old... never)

Still Buddies though. I'm excited for next year when we get to wear matching CRIMSON! Oh snap.

Alas! I think the worst of it was having to venture outside the office. Wearing that ghastly sweater around the office I can handle because folks know exactly what color I bleed (crimson baby!) and thus just follow me with laughter and heckling. This I can handle and this I expected all in good fun. It's when I had to go outside and interact with strangers that I found myself thinking "hide me! Hide me! I promise I'm a UTE!" Or looking at them like "oh no no... don't misunderstand... I'm not a Y fan." I felt like a shamed dog with one of those circle things around their neck so they can't lick their wounds... just bowing their little head in shame with nothing to be done but just pushing through.

And push through I did! Now that's CLASS! And I can't wait to deck out in Crimson next year... there's ALWAYS next year! We got this next year!! Go Utes!