Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Top 5 Things I've Learned/Noticed About Online Dating in 1 Week


It's been a week since I signed on to the online dating scene with LDSPlanet. I can actually say I can see how this is a somewhat useful dating tool. Why do I say this? Well I actually went out on a date with a very nice guy I met "online." Eh? 8 years in singles wards = 3 dates... 4 days on LDSPlanet = 1 date. Not. Bad. At. All. What's more is the guy was actually, well, normal. Now none of you get too excited... it can't be THAT easy because in the end, I wasn't really interested enough for a second date - BUT - if anything it was encouraging.

Of course, there are also the really weird things I've already noticed about online dating. I'd like to tell you of my top 5. These include anything from comments on "profiles" to "chat rooms" to "flirts." If you've ever done the online dating thing - you will know exactly what I mean.

My top 5 Lessons/Observations of Online Dating After 1 Week

5. On a scale of Average, Good Looking, and Very Good Looking - some dudes actually have the audacity... or presumption... ("confidence?" snort) to rate themselves as Very Good Looking. What's more, is each of us has our own little profile picture next to our self-descriptions. So, I'd say it's a pretty big risk to rate yourself as Very Good Looking and post your picture for others to see just how Very Good Looking you are, withouth considering that they've not set our expectations unreasonabley high. Or, perhaps it's more of a reassurence to all those ladies out there that "Hey, don't let the picture fool you! I am, in fact,Very Good Looking! You see? I've listed it as so right there. Therefore, it is true." I'll be honest - there have been a few that are indeed "Very Good Looking" who have described themselves as such, but the fact that THEY posted it - well - I don't think there's room for both me AND their egos at a table for two (three maybe).

4. Everyone... EVERYONE... is "laid back and fun loving... but can be serious when I need to be too"

3. Everyone... EVERYONE.. is "up for anything... I like everything!"

2. Dudes my father's age find nothing weird, pervy, or creepy about sending a 26 year old girl a flirty yellow face with heart eyes exclaiming "I'm interested in you!" Groooooss. Blocked!

1. Dudes can still come across as tools online as well as in person so really - you can eliminate THAT risk of hoping he's not a tool in 'real life' because yes, you can tell quiet easily online just as you could in person. See experience below:

Tool describing himself as Very Good Looking (which... uh... I can see your pic yo) IM's me:
"Hey... wat r u up 2?" (strike 1! He no likey the spelling out of big boy words)
Me: "Nothing... how are you?"
10 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... good. So when we going out?"
Me: "Well you let me know and I'll see what I can pencil in."
10 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... ur busy?" (does lol mean something else than laugh out loud? Have I been utilizing it under that context this whole time and it truly meant something like... er... I can't even think of anything that would make his "lol's" plausible)
Me: "Oh well ya know, just school, and holidays, and work, and living... that kind of stuff"
5 minutes of non-response
Tool: "lol... cool. I hate dates."
Me:"Oh? So, you don't have a typical first date you take a gal out on or anything?"
Tool: "lol... going out with me would be anything bt typical."
Me: "Oh, so atypical?"
10 minutes of silence
Tool: "lol... yeah... I just like to get to know someone."
Me: "Wow. I bet that's really hard since you hate dates, particularly typical ones. I don't even know how you'd work around that scenario."
Tool: "lol... dunno. Guess we'd go to dinner."
Me (clearly enjoying that he does not know I am mocking him): "That's funny. Cause that sounds both like a date and typical."
Tool: "lol..."
10 minutes of non-response
Me: "WELL! Guess I better get to bed (at 9:00)"
Tool: "So should I get ur number?"
Me: (thought: HELL NO!)"Probably not tonight. I don't give out my number... typically"
Tool: (can you guess?) "lol... lata."

You see? Not even a question this guy is a complete idiot. And what's more fun - he didn't even remotely recognize my patronizing his idiocy. Is that wrong for me to take joy in that? Naaaaw!!! I'm allowed some entertainment from it - or I may very well lose hope there's any normal, adjusted, non man-child, out there who knows how to function in society. I'm clinging to that hope with all the gusto I gots in me baby!

So there you have it - exactly what you thought online dating might be, but maybe a little of what you didn't. Sure there are the weirdys and "Very Good Looking's" living on their own delusional 'me-planet' - but there are also some dudes utilizing this little device as yet one more way to open themselves up to meeting new folks (which by the way, Everyone on here LOVES to do!). And honestly - meeting Tool online and meeting him in the Singles Ward would've been the same experience... just a different mode of communication.

lol... lol... lol

Stay tuned...


Andrea, Mrs. said...

Wow, I think I've met (online) that guy a zillion times! I'm surprised you kept letting him "chat" with you. What a tool....

Scott said...

Are you trying to make me jealous by flaunting all your other eBoyfriends in front of me?

If so, it's working.

Adam & MiKail said...

Oh my goodness! I swear that as texting and instant messaging become more commonly used, the English language is dying. At least in that area. It drives me CRAZY when people don't type out full words. And what's with all the LOLs, J/Ks, and ha ha's? Seriously, is there nothing else to say? Wow, this has turned into a bit of a rant! Anyway, I'm glad you're having a good experience with the online dating, and that you get to enjoy mocking a few of the weirdos along the way!

Marisa Jean said...

Not bad--one date within a week, I'm impressed.

LOL= Lack of Likeability (referencing himself, of course), or maybe it means lack of intelligence in another language because he sounds that bright to me.

Gotta agree with you, the lack of ability to spell anything makes an automatic strike! And starting everything with LOL, irritating. I hate that phrase anyway.

Keep us posted. I'm loving hearing about these!

Cory and Michele said...

LOL LOL! So funny! That guy ('tool') was an idiot! At least we can laugh at all of the tool comments if nothing else.

Andrea Jolene said...

OH yes. This whole thing has made for some greeeeeeat stories. Mm hm.

JUST ME, THE MOM said...

Tee hee! Gleefully laughing throughout whole post - way to go girl - hope you find some decent guys while shifting through the chaff:)