Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Cat Poops! A gift of love...

Our kitten poops on the stairs ALL. THE. TIME. Sigh. Ya know - she tricked us. She came home neigh a week ago, and "businessed" right in her little box the first couple days! Granted - it was just #1, but we figured #2 would be well on its way to being boxed as well. I've mentioned she had a few little accidents - but as time went on - we hoped she would understand "Kitty Poop in Box! Good Kitty!" WELL! Kitty does NOT poop in box ONLY...NO NO, Kitty Poops on the stairs (more), and between the couch and the wall if stairs are blocked off to prevent kitty pooping on the stairs. Honestly, I think it has something to do with the odor control litter. It's freaky looking litter to be honest. It looks like large salt crystals and clearly, it's working because she can't smell her poops buried there in to make the connection "smells like poop, this is where I poop." Odor Control has gone too far (and I never thought I'd say that!), and kitty would rather poop where the carpet fibers have soaked in her butt-smell.

In addition to the ambitious odor-control litter theory, you know how cats will drag home..."things" to show their love and appreciate? Example, the cat we had when I was younger, well, #3 of 5 cat we had when I was younger would leave bats...BATS...on our front porch; "Thanks for the food. Thanks for the shelter. Here's a rabid rat with wings to show my appreciate." This makes sense. Right? Well, kitty can not go outside. We've not taken her outside YET is more to the point. So how is she supposed to catch freakishly winged night predators to present us with? Bats are pretty advanced - frankly I was impressed (even flattered) that Mia would go to such lengths to catch such a flying creature, when she herself did not fly, and then after all that work give it to us. It's cute really. But even an occasional mouse carcass is out of reach for Lila (we living in a mouse free condo - presumably). So what's a kitty to do? POOP!

Kitty POOPS on the damnable stairs! I think she decides the stairs is the best place for her to deficate because we'll be sure to see it (step on it, slide through it, smell it) RIGHT when we walk in the door; "Oh look, five piles of kitty appreciation steaming happily on our stairs...what fun!" FEBREZED! CAT! So we've taken to barricading her in the kitchen/laundry room area where her litter box is located. No, the box is NOT in the kitchen, don't flip out, it's in the laundry room connected to the kitchen by the same tile floor but separated by a door. It's sanitary. Of COURSE it's sanitary - do you know me at ALL? We've erected a shift cardboard fence to close off the kitchen area that WE can step over (I somewhat leap over) and she can't get passed...er...now. She used to find a way to wiggle her kitty body between cupboard and cardboard to squeeze herself out; mostly to go poop on the stairs - now that we've stacked my French Books (a use! a use!) near all and any such places that Lila would even CONSIDER trying to nudge through, I think we're pretty much good. She will STAY barricaded in her area until she uses her box successfully for TWO WEEKS! I'm also getting litter that allows a liiiiittle smell. I think it will help her.

Usually when we get home, we let her out because we can watch her. Yet, another ploy kitty uses: to wait until we (I) are in the shower, then she frolics over to the stairs and pops a squat: "I love you family! SPLAT!" Grrrrrr. We're also considering getting a baby gate to block the stairs. No really...we are going to buy a BABY GATE for our cat! It's a good thing she's so durn cute! I was going to post a picture of her wee little face, but I don't want you to sympathize. She's being punished and doesn't need the likes of you people stroking her in congratulations for poo'ing all over the stairs. Bad kitty...very bad.

3 comments:

naomi said...

I am so impressed that Mia the cat caught a bat. Frankly it sounds like a premise to a bad children's book, but nonethelesss impressive.

Quasi said...

I think you have something there about the smell. We like to have our litter boxes be, uh, aromatic. I’d like to tell you that my hilariously funny book, The World Is Your Litter Box, is in bookstores now and is also available on Amazon. The book is cleverly disguised as a cute cat book so humans will buy it, but is, in fact, a how-to manual FOR cats. Check it out on my website, www.theworldisyourlitterbox.com. Your kitten will thank you!

Drae said...

Funny, as always. Not much of a cat fan, so I'll keep my comments to "The stories are entertaining, so if you are willing to live with a cat, I will willingly continue to read impressive posts on your blog" I don't know if I know how to retrieve your email address from this blog stuff. Either I'm too lazy or not smart enough. So here's my blog for the whole world to see. jonnaraephillips.blogspot.com. Ya. Jon thought of it. He says it's our celebrity name. Kinda like Bennifer and Branjalina. Funny.