Monday, November 3, 2008

Why starting a new job makes you fat

I work at Utah System of Higher Education. I started out as a lowly "temp", and then got hired on "fo real", Full Time. I'm really excited to say the least. Though somehow I keep missing the "teacher" boat, what with my degree in English Teaching and French, I still get to work with education in some respect and THAT always makes me happy - or at least feel useful. My office is located at the Gateway - which is "Barnes and Noble neighbor" AWESOME - and I also get to work with some really enjoyable people. I think the "people" in your workplace really make or break a job, don't you? You may not like some aspects of your "work" - but if the people are great then it all evens out.

However...

I've also come to find that there are all sorts of cakes, celebrations, luncheons, jars and jars of candy, holidays, and everything possible you can attach cookies, cupcakes, tootsie rolls (which I ate my weight in the other day) dips, chips, sandwiches, candies candies candies, red vines, soda's, punch, diet cokes, and any other sort of disgusting terrible sugar laiden death you can think of; Every. Single. Day. I'm pretty sure I've gained 5.3lbs (I'm sure because I weighed myself yesterday) just since I started working here. Don't believe me? Let me tell you about my eating habits today shall I?

  • Breakfast - Running late so got Pop Tarts (frosted) and Diet Coke from the vending machine.
  • Lunch - had to go to a training at UVU - thus we stopped at WENDYS on the way back and I got a small fry, chicken nuggets, and passed on the Frosty. At least I had the where with all (read: lactose intolerance)to pass on the Frosty.
  • Being in the Office for only 3 hours: consumed Laffy Taffy someone had sitting out for "all" to eat...and ate a cupcake LITERALLY the SIZE OF MY HEAD for "October" Birthdays. Yes - I could've avoided that cupcake BUT it was for October Birthdays - which I have - and thus felt I should eat only "half a head" of chocolaty frosting goodness the office had so nicely provided to show my appreciation. Though I should consider, I'm 25 now - and my metabolic rate is seriously not what it used to be.

and that's just the beginning...

Thus, I am going to start an intra-office health crash! That's right! With the Holidays upon us and potlucks abounding, it's time to focus on the fresh, green, crunchy, and non-sugar coated. My friends, when the pot-luck list goes around I will sign up for the veggie tray, when some schmuck...er...loving co-worker brings tons of left-overs from this that and the other - I will not eat a smidge of it! No, not a smidge! I will avoid the strategically placed candy jars and bowls loitering shrewdly on desk tops and around cubical corners. Yes! I am going to ban office-sugar from my diet. I am going to get up and eat a sensible breakfast! I am going to limit, learily avoid, and lightly decline all the goodies, salties, calories..ies...that are inevitably going to fill up the office as the Holidays march forth.

Starting a new job always makes you fat - and I'm going to break that cycle. They DO have a gym here in the building and I'm planning on taking FULL advantage of it - as soon as I digest this mountainous cupcake of jiggly doom....mmmm....jiggly doom.

6 comments:

(light) Black And Decker said...

Hm, I thought you looked different...

JUST Kidding.

Cory and Michele said...

Yay! I am so going to participate in your one-woman protest against office sweets, eats, and treats. I am sick of the four o'clock sugar crash I have to deal with every day from working here. It's time to be healthy and show them (whoever they are) whose boss!

Just a thought... said...

Good for you! Always remember ...just because it's free doesn't mean you have to eat it.

Marisa Jean said...

First off, your labels totally crack me up! Espeically the "I want to shrink" one. He he.

Secondly, I've been in and out of this office for nearly 5 years now and it never changes. The newbie always tries to start the "no food philosophy" and we all try for a week or so to join, but then someone brings chips and salsa or that yummy pie and most of us fall. But if you can do it, more power to ya!

Andrea Jolene said...

I should cross stitch that on a pillow "just a thought..." Words to live by. Amen and amen.

Just a thought... said...

Yes ...let's just see how well I follow my own advise. I start selling yummy See's chocolates in the mall next week. My annual Christmas holiday job. I've vowed not to eat a single one. Oh boy! It could get ugly!!!