Thursday, February 26, 2009

Bad Omens and Pet Peeves

This week I encountered what I have now come to believe was a “bad omen” for the rest of the week. Not that my week has been particularly bad - I just had expectations that it MIGHT be because of this little omen I found in my bathroom, scurrying on my wall, on Monday morning. Shudder.

I freaking hate spiders. HATE them. They’re the most terrible creatures on this good Earth. Honestly – I don’t see the point of them nor do I intend to have them on any world I may ever own. “Oh they kill the bugs.” Psh. If that’s they’re only use – and it is – and it’s not even a use – I will increase the population of lizard, snake, and bird to compensate. Yes I’ve thought about this… well… I’ve argued about this with those who think Spiders were not a “creation mistake.” Whatever. Your MOM’S a creation mistake!!! Sorry… I got carried away.

Monday morning I groggily stumbled into my basement bathroom with the intent of… well… bathrooming. Our toilet kinda has it’s own little nook. Wait wait – I will take a picture to illustrate.

See how it’s a nook? Okay.

So there’s the toilet in its nook – and I notice a brown blotch of nasty crouched on the right wall in the toilet nook. I gasp! I squeak “NO!” And little nasty has been so jolted by the sudden bright lights of the bathroom that I had flicked on it – it scurries to the ground and starts to ATTACK! I’m freaking serious! It scurried AT me! It circumvented the toilet – scurried to the toilet brush – and watched. I could see all its piercing eyes watching me stand there hugging myself, balancing on my tip toes. What do I do! What do I do! I ran for it. Ran to my room and put on my large Uggz for to squish the sicky thing. I hate killing them too. This may seem like I might have compassion for ickle bugs – but no – I hate squishing them because that means I have to get near them and I KNOW they will find a way to get into my hair or on my hand or…. Shudder. I can’t go on. So the large THICK Uggz and the fact the creeper was on the floor was ideal. I could handle that. So I cautiously entered the bathroom again. There it is – still hairy and nasty and terrible – crouching by the toilet brush. It’s a face off. I take a step. SCURRY! SCREAM! DAH!!! It rushes into a space between the floor and baseboard… escaping.

NO!!! Do you have any idea what this MEANS???!?!??!?!? I could not under any sort of circumstance even consider using my nook toilet for DAYS! DAYS! I can’t render myself incapacitated like that. I mean think about it. You go to nook toilet to do your various nook toilet business and some freaky spider is just waiting for the right moment – when you’re in the middle of whatever business is required – to rush out and EAT you!!! And you can’t escape without making it awkward or a mess or BOTH! It’s literally getting caught with your pants down! Ew. Spiders WOULD do that. Evil beastys.

Thus – the first day or two after the spider incident I did not use that toilet. I had to use the ones at work or the other one upstairs – but under no circumstance was I going to risk an attack. Yesterday – I REALLY wanted to use MY personal toilet nook and decided I would go in with my Ugg boots on (which I’d naturally been doing every morning before showering… checking everywhere before I went about my routine and jumping at any sort of perceived movement in my peripheral) and do what I needed to as fast as I could. Things went well. I’ve begun to be more comfortable. And this morning – I utilized the nook toilet without the Uggz. Needless to say though – the bad omen itself made the week a little more stressful. It’s been a looooong week. I had two days in Park City doing presentations – of which I had to BE there by 7:30am. Presentations are energy-suckers anyway. I also had a DOCTORS appointment. Of the UNPLEASANT Doctors appointment sorts. Ahem. Cough. Yes. So that always makes one’s week a little more… cold and uncomfortable. It’s also only Thursday – and I remember thinking Tuesday should’ve been Thursday. That's been rough. I think I’m fighting some sort of aching sickness – AND – people keep throwing trash in the back of my truck.

I’m serious! Who does that? Is this a natural consequence of driving a truck? Does it LOOK like a garbage can to you Mr. Iceburg Shake Drinker? Ben’s Cookies Eater? Take-out orderer? Sheesh! It’s the weirdest thing! People throw their random trash into the back of MY truck! I don’t want your stinking garbage and I really don’t see how you can be in such a garbage bind as to think dumping your refuse INTO a STRANGERS vehicle is somehow your only way out. It’s disgusting. I don’t want your trash! I’m also annoyed I have to clean it out of the back of my truck and throw it away for you. Have your mothers taught you NOTHING? Do you HAVE mothers? Maybe I will open your Volvo’s back door and chuck my half eaten Costa Vida salad on the back seat. Perhaps I’ll come to your house and dump my trash on your lawn – it looks like it should go there cause – well – it’s not mine and I really do need to get rid of it right this minute.

“Honey – we need to throw away this bag of left over fries and junior bacon cheeseburger”

“Oh dear, just chuck it in the back of that 99 Ford Ranger. They drive a truck – clearly they don’t mind if there’s trash in there."

“True. Besides, they owe us. What can they expect for driving a truck?”

I mean, I'm really trying to follow the logic of the redneck fool, or yuppie Gateway princess shopper who thinks chucking her grande Decaf, no-Whip, White Chocolate, Mocha-Latte cup "like, totally in that icky truck. OMG. It looks like so, not... like my red Beamer Daddy got me for my sweet 17 and a half Birthday. Just chuck it in Brit, honey."

It's become a rather LARGE pet peeve.

So there you have it - a bad omen and people throwing garbage in the back of my truck. I think I'd take the garbage over the spider omen though. Shudder. It's time to set a bug bomb - then find some willing home teacher to come vacuum up the carcases. Mmmm, spider carcases. The best way for a spider to be - dead.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Anthropologie - a simple sort of torture -And other weekend happenings

I had a rather enjoyable weekend. To be honest, I've had a string of really decent weekends and I'm pretty happy about the whole thing. Weekends are nice regardless because it means not working - but on the other hand they can also be a sad reminder of what a huge SINGLE LOSER WITH NO FRIENDS you are. Lately, however, I've had some good weekends. Even my Valentines last weekend, naturally dateless, was pleasant. To be honest, Valentines has never been here nor there for me. Last year was my first of what could be deemed a "real Valentines" (because I actually HAD a Valentine) in the 24 years of my existence up that point. So this year was back to regular old "Oh wait what? Valentines is THIS weekend? Oopsy" Chirp. It only means should I ever see an actual point to Valentines weekend again, I will be extremely easy to please... just the usual flowers and chocolates will do. Make note someone out there and pass it along someday... in the next 5 years... hopefully. Cough. BUT that weekend is in the past. Lets talk about this weekend, shall we? Yes.


I left work early. HOLLA! Love that. Then Nik and I had the chance to see my fellow shorty friend, Camille Nelson (see side bar and accompanying link) put on a concert for her debut album, First Words, at the Fort Douglas theater near the U. Several things to note about this outing. FIRST how much I envy the musically gifted. There's no need to mention how intently and intrinsically music touches our collective souls, not to mention individual lives, in powerfully indescribable ways. I can play the piano - averagely - I like to sing - averagely...or in the car...or in a choir - and I'm trying to learn the guitar. I am a music appreciator in almost every respect, and love attending anything from the symphony to a concert, opera, musicals, the ballet, you name it. So when someone can produce such unique and incredible music and then have the confidence to share it with everyone around them, I envy that. I envy the confidence and the talent. I wish I could do it - but I love that I can really appreciate it. And yes, I'm one of those "when I have kids they will all pick one instrument and take lessons for at least 5 years so help me heaven!" Thus my SECOND thought about the evening: I want a house full of music - any music (hopefully I can sucker one of them into the violin or cello) - and definitely a whole lot of music appreciation. THIRD - anyone who has the talent should take the risk, the opportunity, to share it.

After the concert Nik and I ate some mini-burgers (because if they're mini... they don't count as burgers... it's practically eating celery, right?) and discussed how we appreciate music. It then goes silent as we try and think of any talents we might have comparable - and come up with nothing. So instead, we order some more ranch for the regular sized fries and discuss other things. Everything's better regular sized, for example.


Anthropology is a simple kind of torture in the cruelest forms. You may think it's because everything they produce is quite easily spectacular and beautiful and lovely and costs more than half your monthly rent. Yet, you are still tempted to buy it. You are STILL tempted even though that yellow dress with its neck ruffles and flutter sleeves is HALF your rent. How is that not cruel? I went ahead and tried on....oh....about 10 items just to make sure I loved them. And then, I put 10 items back. I couldn't do it. I couldn't justify it. I can't wait for my tax refund. My roomie Mary and I were in Anthro for about 2 hours - drooling and longing - before we drug ourselves away. After being surrounded by $78 cotton tee's and $158 lined dresses, we decided to go to Urban Outfitters, which would now seem reasonable.

Enters second round of quiet Anthro cruelty... the real torture.

After spending several hours trying on some of the most glorious pieces of clothing any sort of clothing store has to offer, Urban just. didn't. cut. it. The clothes just didn't fit right... or... feel right... or.... crying out in anguish "Just take them back! Gasp! It's just not the same!! I want that $78 cotton tee that fit just so and felt in every way made for my little stumpy short curving bod! Just take it all back!!" Rush out of store in huff...and then get distracted by Urban jewelry and examine a few pricey pieces.

And if there IS one thing that shopping makes you realize it's time to work out.

And we did; which helped me calm down a bit.

Then Nik and I went to our third, yes third, viewing of the High School production Beauty and the Beast. Why the 3rd time you might ask? WELL! Even though it IS my favorite little Disney animation, this is not the reason for sitting through 3 productions of it in High School's throughout Utah: Emery, Taylorsville, and Woodscross respectively.

Emery: My little brother was cast as Maurice and THUS I had to attend. Family obligation - and it was good. Nikelle came because I demanded it. That's right.

Taylorsville: My cousin was part of the production of her High School's rendition Beauty and the Beast. And I demanded Nik attend. Luckily, she had yet to acquire a life and attended. And I paid for that one.

Woodscross (last night): Nik took her little niece and nephew and demanded I attend. Well. She had met my demands so I felt it was my duty (and considering I also have not acquired anything resembling a "life" per se) to attend. Plus, I heard Woodscross puts on a mean show and really, we were making an excellent habit of it. Why break the streak? Actually, I might note that the Clock, Cogsworth, reminded me of the Martin Short character Clifford from the movie Clifford. I'd seen that movie a long long long...looooong time ago before viewing it again in January, and I think I laughed more than most people there because I had that character in my mind. Pretty awesome. Ahem... and now moving on from the pointless side note to...


I made dinner! For myself! Woot! .... I've accepted that most things I make will only be for me for awhile. C'est la vie.

It's a Vegetarian Pasta dish I witnessed Giada Laurentiis make on the food network some time ago and noted it down to make in some distant future kitchen one day. It was one of those things I pictured baking as a washed little dirty outside hands and put away his briefcase for the second time that day. What? I can have sububan dreams. Sue me. Anyway, I then found the recipe last week in my roomies Everyday Pasta cookbook and purchased the ingredients immediatly. I'm not waiting for suburbia to eat better. I've also been trying to get into the habit of making delicious food on Sundays, and then eating it for lunch at work the entire week. Saves money, and cultivates my "cooking" talents. It's one talent I've been working on slowly for several years. I also hope to help me eat healthier in general. Yup. Healthy eating - healthy lifestyle. Very un-American.

The Veggies



And that's my pleasant weekend. Not bad eh? I need to tote my camera around with me again. I've been using my phone - but the pixels just aren't doing it for me. And don't pretend they are doing it for you.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Just when you think you’re done – St. George rears its ugly head…again

Yes. I am going to St. George AGAIN! It’s okay though. Last time was unexpectedly okay. I was worried I’d want to throw myself off a balcony, but what with flying down there as well as basking in the glowing sun and finding some good bargains, it made the trip rather pleasant. At the very least it wasn’t the lonely exhausting trips from the 4 times before that. There’s really not much you could do to make that any worse. Shudder. This really is the LAST time this year though. Very last. Last Last.

Actually, here’s an irony, my Ward is planning this big ole “St. George Singles Trip” the end of March. I’m pretty soured against that drive and immediately thought “No way. I will miss that little venture thank you very much.” Then they mentioned such things as biking and hiking and being outside…and I’ve become more tempted. I dunno. I’m so so SO over the Singles Ward scenario. I think I “over-killed” in my faithful 40th Ward of 2003-2007 on Singles Ward involvement, and now feel like I’ve “been there, done that.” Singles Wards have a very different vibe to them as many of you former and current Singles Wards attendees can attest. Also, the older you get, the weirder they get. For example, last week my roomie Mary and I decided we’d attend FHE. We’d been in the Ward about a month and though we are regular full block church go’ers, we had yet to attend any activity beyond that. Meh. So this time we decided to give it a try. The activity involved Bingo and Elderly folks. That sounded pretty awesome to me. No, I’m not being sarcastic. I thought it sounded really fun and honestly, the service type activities are the only ones I feel are the most worth while. I will always go to the service ones…and the Temple ones. The others are few and far between.

(Oh! Can I tell you though? Once in my Provo ward they planned a “service” activity that involved picking up garbage on this lovely trail up Provo Canyon for 30 minutes and then we were to enjoy lunching and staring at each other for another 2 hours. Uh…what? Really? That’s the only service we could think of to provide for the surrounding community (which I might add is full of low income families and elderly)? Picking up some bits of depris along a dirt road to ultimately end in more munching and mingling? Lingering longer? Feeding the flock? Fruit and Flirt? (ha..okay I’m done)That ward seemed notorious for essentially labeling “come eat and talk to each other” under the guise of “Service Project”, “FHE”, “Ward Mow the Lawn Day,” “Drive to get Ice Cream as a Ward Activity Day”, and “Make Cookies for those Who Don’t Show up to these Activities to Encourage Them to Come Day” extremely well. Ultimately – all of those activities centered around a loosely put together project and mainly food and talking talking talking to the same people. Sigh. I shouldn’t say much more or I will be called to be activities co-chair….again).

Anyway, beside the point. Mary and I attended this “service” FHE with the hope of keeping company with elderly folks and interacting with our new ward. WELL! We got there and found about 30 young singles – 25 of them girls – and no elderly folks. What? Well, we sat down at a table in front of some Bingo cards, hoping the elderly would arrive soon. Two BINGO’s later…Three Bingos’…a few Singles Ward-esque questions like “so like, who’s your ward crush?” and “win a date for this weekend!” and still no Elderly. Though – I did get to watch the stunning antics of 3 girls ogling over the same cute, dark, and tall boy one row behind us. That was pretty funny. The girlys were all smiles and giggles and arm touches and leg rubs throughout the entire thing. They all “leaned” towards him with their hair brushing his shoulder now and again or touching his hand while taking his macaroni off the Bingo sheet. How clever. The boy was very cute – seemed really nice – and in fact I remember him speaking in sacrament our first Sunday there and being rather impressed – however – I’ve not seen him without a gaggle of girls floating on his every (actually dorky) word. Too bad. Gaggles of girls around one dude automatically turns me right off. I will likely never meet this boy – and now I don’t care too. Ya know? I don’t do competition at all – AND – I don’t want to be part of the “following.” He doesn’t seem to notice them all grouping around him and is nice to all of them – which was refreshing – but again – not worth trying for. One of those other 10 groupys will snag him. Maybe that’s my problem, I don’t care to fight over anyone. Meh. I choose a single life then ;) I’m a lover, not a fighter. Though in a Singles Ward the two seem like natural allies…to love you must fight…or claw rather. Anyway, nothing too entertaining happened other than Mary and I’s simultaneous realization that we are very much over Singles Wards. Very. Much. Over. I think I turned into a “Sunday and REAL service activity only” member of that Ward right then; with a monthly dash of Visiting Teaching of course. I don’t have the energy to “hunt.” Thus, I’m really debating the Ward St. George venture…biking and hiking on one hand…dealing with Singles Ward antics and gimmicks on the other. Tough. Very tough. We’ll see what happens. Plus, I’ve St. George’ed so much that it’s really lost any and all appeal – as you avid readers of La Blog are very much aware of; especially since I’m going down AGAIN this week. Here’s the deal – if Dr. Jack goes – I will go. Okay, done.

At least I am flying down Tuesday night. I am so glad to be flying. Yes, I am still nervous on those little biddy planes – but I get to read the entire time and it only takes 1 hour vs 5 long long long…long driving hours. I will be there a total of one night and one day – then come right back to SLC around 7pm on Wednesday. Easy peezy. Maybe I will go running OUTSIDE when I get there this time. Gasp! Maybe! The only annoying thing about the venture is my barely missing the afternoon flight home (it leaves at 2:30 and I’m done at 2:30) and having to putz around for 3 hours until MY flight leaves at 5:30. Meh. Again, if there is a sound internet connection, not to mention Charles Dickens coming with me, it won’t be that bad. Maybe security dude will mistake me for Angelina Jolie again! Sigh…one can always hope.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

It’s that Time Again. Swim Suit Shopping Time (horrified scream!)

It’s a dark and stormy night. The wind whistles eerily through the trees. Something cries out mournfully in the dark. The moon creeps slowly behind an ominious cloud, shutting out any ethereal light that might offer some ray of hope on this shadowy evening. You are alone. The silence is engulfing. Something stirs in the brush…then slinks away silently into the thick wood. You see a flash of light – for a moment illuminating your surroundings – and then all is dark again. The silence is softly broken by a deep rumble in the distance…the storm approaches.
Dun dun dun.

No, this is not me being overly dramatic. I wanted to create the perfect scene for what I’m about to discuss. Swim suit shopping (horrified scream!)!!! What a complete nightmare.

I realize its February. But, that only means perhaps another month until full blown swim suit hunting begins. Pure disaster really. Shopping for a swim suit is probably one of the hardest most self-deprecating, depressing, and frustrating times of the entire year. As if realizing you’ve eaten your weight in starches and sweets every week for the last 4 months, writing it off as “oh, I can still wear bulky sweaters for at least another month or so – pass the Costco meatballs” isn’t a hefty enough indicator you really should consider hitting the gym more than twice a week; try listening to a co-worker talking about her trip to sunny Hawaii (or Mexico), or a family member packing flip flops for Spring Break in San Diego. That’s when it really hits you – oh my gosh I might have to wear a swim suit again soon too! Panic ensues. You’re stunned. How could you let yourself be blindsided (again) by the idea of lighter, tighter, lesser, clothes Spring and Summer months inherently engender? HOW!?!?? It happens every damn year! Standing there with a pumpkin spice soy steamer in one hand and your second buttery croissant in the other, glancing down at your more than a “little” squishy and definitely lumpier bod, seeing that that bulky sweater isn’t so bulky anymore, you realize what you’ve done to yourself. What those breads, cookies, desk candies, buttery croissants, oversized sweaters and loose fitting overcoats have done to you. They’ve made you feel safe, secure, FREE, and at ease in their startchy comfort and stretchy fibers. All is well in Zion, is it chocolate chip muffin? Is it? You lied to me! Then BAM! A suddenly warm piece of weather front moves through one day and SNAP your friends want to take a trip to the Caribbean in a month and though you are definitely not going because your pathetically poor and can barely afford your daily Cup-O-Noodles – you MIGHT go to the Caribbean SOMEDAY and by heaven you had best not look like the dumpy little Snowman you’ve suddenly blanched into. It’s time to get serious. Dump the steamer, finish off that croissant (because really – this is the last one so you might as well eat it) and hit that gym because sister! It’s time to go SWIM SUIT SHOPPING! Lighting strike! Thunder! High pitched cackle of hot bikini models!! Nooooooooo!!!

The quest for that perfect swim suit has begun.

You know the one I’m talking about. The one that covers what it should and stays where it should, flatters what it should, minimizes what it should, and supports where it should. And not only does it do all this but it also comes in a variety of colors and patterns for your glorious choosing. It is likely this swim suit does not exist. Well, that’s not true. I’ve heard some legends, myths if you will, of folks in far away lands that have stumbled upon such a find and have happiness and contentment for the rest of their lives. Sigh. Think of it! The perfect suit! After years and years of searching and crying and tugging and twisting and tieing and regrets and returns and…gasp…to finally find it. The one. The swim suit of all suits, and in your size and price range too! Birds fly over the rainbow, why oh why can’t I?

Because you’re a dumpy little snowman. That’s why. So let’s start there. Time to melt it off – and then take the plunge into the swim suit shopping frenzy. I’m starting early. Perhaps if I start trying things on it will not only 1. Motivate me to stop eating and start moving but 2. Perhaps I can get past the first round of suit searches before the crowds start to realize they want to go with their friends to the Caribbean someday too. It always helps to beat the rush.
Thus, here’s what I’ve found. (Note: JCrew is your best chance. I know this from years of research – trust me. JCrew.) Opinions please. If we can face this evil together –maybe – just maybe – one of us will end up with that “golden suit” this year. The one you are willing the shell out any amount of anything for: cash – favors – first borns – whatever. Some of the early options are as follows:

Vintage Classic. Can't ever go wrong...

This in the blue seersucker. I'm feeing this one the most right now.

Polka Dots! Done!

I appreciate your time on the matter. And might I throw out a “Good Luck!” to all of you who have also just realized how much those weekly baking binges actually contributed to your “sweat pants are all that fit me right now” delima. Yeeeeeah, I thought it might’ve been my drier too. Ahem. Come to find…

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Volleyball! Frisbee! Indiana Jones! Shopping! Arrested Development! Volleyball! Clean House! Volleyball! Good Movie! Volleyball…

This is the recipe for a really nice weekend. Let me start from the beginning, shall I? Yes, lets.

I spent the day at the Capitol on Friday. It was exciting for little country girl me. Though I am still a peon and don’t mean much of anything to anyone connected or important, it was a step! It’s an environment I can completely see myself involved in – politics, legislation, change, discussion, awesome. That said – I also completed my MPA application for the UofU and am now waiting to hear of my acceptance…or denial…but mostly acceptance. One thing I’ve always been able to control, one thing that keeps me focused and hopeful, is school. School gives me purpose. I’m so excited to have that routine again. ANYWAY – I went to the capitol on Friday – so it was an exciting day and I was really tired when I got home. My roomie, Mary, and I decided we would have a nice slow evening at home. Even if we had boyfriends we would’ve chosen to stay home that night! I want that to be apparent. It wasn’t a forced “loser” weekend…though I have plenty of those. We took our “nice night at home” to Blockbuster, naturally, and tried to find a nice chicky flicky to watch. When we walked in – Blockbuster was hosting their “Buy 3 for $20” sale. I started perusing through their selection; never knowing what joys awaited me. I found several movies I would’ve considered purchasing, Persepolis, The Mummy (I love the Mummy), etc. My eye then fell on one Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. I’m a big Indiana Jones fan and though not many folks liked the latest installment – I know I sure did and have always loved all the Indiana In fact, for years I’d been asking for Birthdays and Christmas’s for the complete Indiana Jones trilogy – Raiders of the Lost Ark, Temple of Doom, and the Last Crusade. Alas, they have eluded me, until this night. I began looking around eagerly to see if the table contained the “old school” Indies. Of course, I never expected they would have all 3 Indiana Jones installments on the 3 for $20 table. Maybe one or two of them, but never all 3. Never. Then, I found Temple of Doom. I picked it up just in time to see The Last Crusade resting next to it. My breath caught in my throat – could Raiders of the Lost Ark be here too? Dare I hope? I didn’t see it immediately. I feverishly began shuffling through the stacks of bargain previously viewed movies…Tomb Raider, Lions and Lambs, SAW IV (shudder), and…AND Indiana Jones the Raiders of the Lost Ark. Can we all say Tender Mercy? As Barack would say, “Yes we can!” I found all 3 (nay 4) Indiana Jones installments on the Blockbuster 3 for $20 table when usually it would be in “specialty” pack at Circuit City for $40. Sold! The first ingredient to a great weekend.

Ingredients two and three manifested themselves on Saturday morning. My friend Mallory texted me at 9am and said the only word I like hearing at 9am on Saturday morning, “Volleyball.” Done and done. I called my friend Ryan (who also loves that word at 9am on Saturdays) jumped in my car and played some saweet volleyball at the UofU volleyball court until 11:00am. Awesome. It was really great play too. I am a…oh…volleyball snob. And to be frank, it had probably been over a year since I’d played on a gym floor full court. I had played on grass in Provo (loved it. Miss it sooooo much), and had the awesome opportunity to play some half court gym volleyball about 4 weeks ago; so some full court volleyball was not only great fun, but a pretty decent work out. Dah! I love volleyball.

But it doesn’t end there. On my way home from volleyball – I got a texty from my friend Robby with two more words I really enjoy hearing “Ultimate Frisbee.” Done! Now, two summers ago I THOUGHT I was decent at Ultimate Frisbee. I was a hustler and rather accurate with my tosses. Well, upon moving to Provo, I found that I did not have the skills I thought I did. There are techniques involved! There are wrist flicks, specific tosses, forehands! Last summer I was taught all these things – and practiced them almost everyday. I’ve been antsy to try my new skills in a real game ever since. Winter makes this difficult – but when Rob texted me I knew my opportunity to prove my skills had come. We played “box” in the snow. You Ultimate Frisbee enthusiasts know what “box” is I’m sure – I had no idea. They explained it to me and we started to play. I would like to report that I quickly dusted off my skills and not only threw some accurate tosses the conventional way, but took a risk with my newly acquired skills at the forehand…and nailed that sucker every time. I was so proud of myself! Not only did I find out how much more fun the game was with my new skills (and possibly new respect from "real" players!) – I also realized how out of shape I really was. Yowch. I was huffing and puffing and so spent by the time we were done – I vowed to up my running regime from 3 days to 4, and from 3 miles to 4, starting Monday. It was so much fun though. It felt so good to be playing both of these invigorating sports all in one Saturday morning. How lucky can someone get? Eh? EH?!?!?!

I got home and my roomie had scrubbed the house. I can’t tell you how much I love coming home to a spick and span house. Loves it. This also inspired me to clean my room and scrub my bathroom. Clean clean clean. Lovely lovely lovely.

I then did some shopping. My friend Nik called me up and we ventured to La Nordstrom. I hadn’t planned on buying anything. I really like shopping. Okay, I love shopping. I really do. I like good clothes, unique clothes, and want to have a unique style. Of course, financial constraints have restricted and/or eliminated this hobby from my life for a long time and will continue to stringently limit this for a long while yet. At Nordstrom, however, I not only found some awesome dark blue skinny jeans on wicked sale, BUT, found them in the right size AND, even more importantly, the right LENGTH for my stubby little legs. Not alternations needed what. So. Ever. Yes We Can! I also found a great sweater on sale at Anthropology, some discount rings at Charlotte Russe, and a lovely baby pearl necklace at JMR. Shopping. A much needed ingredient in any good weekend – it’s like the cinnamon on your toast or the cream in your hot cocoa – great deals in great stores. Perfect. Oh – I also found these…

Didn’t get them because they were very much NOT on sale – but a girl can dream. If I were to marry – I would find my “wedding announcement outfit” in that store. Just a girl side note.

I then saw a fantastic movie. Now don’t snigger. With all my snobby reading and sports and movie ways – this may come as a surprise to many of you. But, I’m going to go ahead and say, “He’s Just Not that Into You” was an awesome movie. Hilarious. Witty. Touching. Smart. It hit everything and hit it well. I can’t believe how much I enjoyed this movie. I would go see it again – in the theater – for $8. I highly recommend this movie.

Sunday. Sunday’s are always good days. Am I right? So right. Church was great. And when the roomies and I got home, we made ourselves some pigs in a blanket (my choice), drank some Diet Soda, cooked up some Costco meatballs, and dished out hummus and pita chips. Then, my roomies boyfriend started talking about a show I’d started watching, started loving, and then stopped watching rather suddenly: Arrested Development. I mentioned how much I’d liked it and how sad I was I hadn’t been able to get through the rest of the second season and into the 3rd. Well! Roomie’s cool b/f had all the episodes on his I-phone and we plugged it into our TV and watched one of the best episodes ever. It was also extremely nostalgic and brought back a flood of memories from my month in California. Don’t you love it when you are reminded of old jokes you’d forgotten about over the months? Especially when they come back in all their glorious hilarity! This particular episode my favorite character, Gob (said Job), is told by his “wife” the she’s in love with his brother-in-law. And he just doesn’t grasp what she’s trying to say. Me? ME! One of those things you’d had to of been there – BUT – if you’ve not experienced this show – might I suggest you find some way to experience it? Yes. You. Can.

Those were the main events of my weekend. Too add some sprinkles, our piano is tuned which made for some great playing, I found a beginning guitar class I can take over the summer at the U, AND I’m going to finish my Dickens novel soon. It’s just those simple things that really make a weekend enjoyable, ya know? I don’t have to do anything extravagant; attend huge parties, go on dates (though it wouldn’t hurt - still working on Dr. Jack), things like that. But rather, I like doing a series of things that just makes me happy; the reading, the sports, the movie, the clean house, and I count it a successful weekend. I even got all my laundry done AND wrote a post. Productive and enjoyable.

And now, because of this weekend, I have hopefully a consistent volleyball and Frisbee group. My friend Rob said we’d perfect our skills and join the SLC Ultimate league come the summer.

It’s hard to move to a new (or "have been removed for a year") town – mostly because it’s hard to build any sort of social existence from scratch – but now it’s starting to bud. Hurray for social buds! Hurray for volleyball, frisbee, good movie, clean house, excellent ward, and Dr. Jack buds. I like it when things start to look up...I could get very used to it.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Weird Crushes and then some...

I was rather bored at work today and tried to think of some sort of amusing post I could create to take up some time. This is what I’ve come up with – Weird Crushes.
Yeah okay, so that’s not creative at all. But, the inspiration hit while reading an article on CNN about plane crashes. The article had nothing to do with it. But the sidebar next to the story I was reading showed a Netflix advert with the face of Shia LeBoeuf…ya know…Lewis Stevens from Even Stevens? Those were the days! I’m sure all ya’ll know him more from Transformers or Indiana Jones or even his brief stint on I Am Robot. I only know he was in THAT because I watched it on FX a couple Sundays ago and remember saying “Hey! I didn’t know Shia was in this! I love him!” He will always be Lewis Stevens to me though. At any rate, that’s where the inspiration comes in – again I thought “Oh I love him!” and figured, that’s kinda a weird little crush. I then started thinking of all the weird little crushes I have on dudes most girls wouldn’t glance at. I’d like to try and explain why this is – more for myself – but if you are interested by all means, carry on:
Barack Obama: This one can’t be too surprising. Not only is he the most powerful man in the world, but daaaaamn that man is good lookin! Serious! Have you seen his “moves?” The man gots moves. Plus ya know, President of the United States, winning smile, the voice of a minister, family man, so NOT Bush, and he was a Professor; a profession I pretty much find about the sexiest thing you could ever do. Academia is sexy: cord jackets with leather elbow patches, glasses, loafers, morning scruff left over from late night paper correcting and lecture planning, Mm! Which brings me naturally to…

Professors in General: I think I “squee” a little internally when someone says they’re going to be a professor. I’ve always been this way. Come to think of it – most of my crushes have had something to do with men in Academia. Indiana Jones? Dr. Jones? I’d much rather see him in his classroom teaching archeology than whipping Nazi’s – though I won’t complain about that either. Oh. Then they throw in the eternally sexy Sean Connery and make HIM a Professor too??? What are they trying to DO to me? I also find it insanely attractive how excited Profs get about their subject matter. It’s adorably endearing. Others call it “nerdy” but I call it tantalizing. Yeah….academia is hot. So hot. Guess I picked the right profession – go Higher Education! Woot!

Okay, so here’s a weird one I really don’t know if I can explain (justify)…

Phillip Seymour Hoffman: Weird, right? I kinda like him. I mean, I kinda find him attractive and I have absolutely no idea why. I’ve tried to pin point it – I mean he’s a rather portly, very red-headed man, with nothing that even remotely resembles stereotypical Hollywood man-candy, but for some reason, I like. He has a great voice. Have you noticed? Deep and melodic. That might be it. And he has this “look” in his eyes of…quiet confidence? Perhaps? He’s incredibly talented – that’s a no brainer. It’s his…manner I guess. He carries himself in a unique and attractive way. Plus – he’s rather dry, funny, seems fairly laid back, and yes, I’ll say it again, has a “manner” about him. Weird. Attractive weird.

Steve Carell: Yep. Yet again – odd one. However, I know exactly where this weird crush comes from – his sense of humor. Combine that with well, that’s about it I guess, he’s just funny. Plus he kinda has the “short stocky” build I tend to like. But really, mainly, it’s his sense of humor. I realize there are a lot of funny guys out there – younger better lookin ones – but I like his sense of humor particularly. His and Jack Black’s– though – I find Mr. Black rather gross. Awesome of course! But, gross. He doesn’t make the weird crush list. As if that redeems me from Philip Seymour Hoffman somehow. Cough.

Simon Cowell: I forget my love of him until I watch American Idol. It’s the cold British exterior combined with what is clearly a bleeding heart at the same time. Come on ya’ll! He just tells it as it is – BUT he’s not heartless. Shoot. I’d like someone to tell me I suck if I sucked. Ya know? Be the jerk to be the friend kind of scenario? Especially if it was Simon Cowell. Think about it, you’d want someone to tell you your fly is down or maybe not to go so short next time, right? Right. Now if Simon were a Professor – look out! British Academia? I need to pause and gather myself…

Anderson Cooper: this one isn’t so weird is it? I mean he’s successful, good looking, decent sense of humor, smart, Ivy league grad, and seems like a decent guy. I don’t think I need to explain this one too much – but there’s something about him that makes me do a “360.” Har har har, get it? Okay, bad joke.

Mark Koelbel of Channel 2 News: Also not so weird, right? This is a good looking man! I have a roomie who is looking for a job at several stations around SLC, and I keep telling her to apply to Channel 2 because that’s my station of choice, but mostly so I can meet Mark Koelbel. Well, we looked up his “bio” online…and it merely solidified why I like him so much. Here are some examples: Dream Job: World renown poet/or a singer songwriter, Role Model: My mom and dad, Hidden Talent: Accomplished drummer, Height: 6'1, Hobbies: Tennis, music, watching sappy movies with happy endings, Favorite Author: Hunter Thompson (rad), Favorite Moviestar: Living: Scarlett Johannson Dead: John Wayne/Errol Flynn. Cool right? That’s really the only way to describe him…cool. Oh, and married. But I can still think he’s cool and good looking. I saw him at the 7-11 near the mouth of Big Cottonwood once. Man drives a Subaru…or he did.

Angelina Jolie: It’s” weird” cause she’s a girl and so am I…not that there’s anything wrong with that. I mean it’s weird for me…cause I like boys. Ahem. Anyway, girl crush. Totally.

Jimmy Fallon: Oh my my. Also not so weird. He’s absolutely 100% adorable in every. Single. Way. Of course he’s got a fabulous sense of humor, and played a Math teacher (leather patched blazer and everything) in Fever Pitch. He’s a nice guy, nice dresser, nice glasses, nice HAIR, oh yes, I think we’ve crossed the line from “weird crushes” to “who doesn’t have a crush on that boy?” Must be time to stop.

WELL! That took up some good time! Most excellent. To conclude this post of “weird crushes” I would like to restore your belief in my “good taste” by naming my ” Top Men I would Marry Tomorrow and You Just Might Too“, In no particular order…
  • Matthew Fox/Dr. Jack (duh)
    Jason Bateman/Michael Bluth
  • John Krasinski/Jim Halpert

  • David Ducohvney/Agent Mulder

  • Collin Firth/of the Mr. Darcy “Firths”
  • Mr. Bingley – the Austen character of course

  • Will Smith
  • And Jimmy Fallon. I think he fits into this list more comfortably.
Patterns? Nerdy, nice guys with a good sense of humor, which apparently don’t really exist. Don’t worry – I’m still holding out for Singles Ward Dr. Jack…the only man I’d ever wait for. You’d wait too if you’d seen him! In the meantime maybe I’ll go rent a couple of seasons of the Office supplemented with some Mission Impossible III (for Hoffman, not for Cruise) and see if there are any syndicated episodes of The X-Files on SciFi. Good idea.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

The Dating Sabbatical Begins...and then I met Dr. Jack

I went to my singles ward today. Well of course I did. As of last week I decided I was on a "dating sabbatical" by the way. I shoud shoot that in there. Somehow making my "non-dating" voluntary seems less pathetic. What's funny - is once you decide to not worry about something - "options" pop up. Example below.

At any rate, I went to my singles ward today - and because of my "sabbatical" I've not been "scoping out the options" cause I really don't care. I'm emotionally spent, it's been a very long and hurtful year, and I just need time to recuperate, ya know? Gather the forces again, put the neosporem (I spelled that how I say it - don't judge) on my heart wounds, and let things heal up. I have absolutely no desire to get back in the game - I just need a rest. A nice break. I need to strengthen myself spiritually, emotionally, and even physically. I had some eye opening experiences lately - and realized that I was expecting too much from folks who can't give it to me. I needed to put that reliance in someone else - in something else - in a higher power. SO! That's the reason for the dating sabbatical decision. I need to rely on the Lord, and become a strong independent person with Him, before I will be any good for anyone else. I gotta be me - the real me - the optimistic, happy, and sure-footed person I used to be. Yes indeed. Dating sabbatical is a GREAT plan, and I won't be an "emotion-suck" for anyone else.

THEN I realized Dr. Jack is in my ward. Ya know - Dr. Jack from LOST (bom bom). Yeah. He's in my Ward. Smack lips. Sooooo, okay. I mean, if there is a Dr. Jack involved - the dating sabbatical may have a few stipulations. We'll call them Dr. Jack stipulations :) Also - for FHE tomorrow we're playing some Ward volleyball - which means volleyball playing fellas (maybe). Now, as a general rule I don't play ward volleyball because I am a volleyball snob and ward volleyball can't think of any other word for "a joke" or "rather crappy" or "Beehive." BUT - it's time to start working it in the Ward. I've been without my own little ward for a long time - and am so ready to create a little Ward family again. Visiting teaching, callings, saweet. I'm feeling that. However, I'm still going to go with the "must fully heal from past wounds dating sabbatical" for a little while - until I find myself again - or until Dr. Jack finds his way over to my side of the court. Mm, yes. Dr. Jack rules definitely apply do volleyball fellas. I will keep my eye on this good Doctor. Having a little crush is harmless, and to be honest, feels refreshing. It makes church more fun too. And who knows, perhaps it will help me get out of my dating sabbatical earlier than planned. I'm not against that.